


Unintentional

by AquilaTempestas



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types
Genre: Comedy, Gen, Humour, Team Galactic - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-14
Updated: 2020-12-14
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:06:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28066701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AquilaTempestas/pseuds/AquilaTempestas
Summary: A rogue pokémon sneaks into the Galactic headquarters. The commanders try and remove its presence before the boss appears, but it proves to be a challenging battle and a miserable one for Cyrus.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 9





	Unintentional

**Author's Note:**

> I like writing about Team Galactic in light-hearted fun situations.

Jupiter was on her way to the conference room when she heard a shrill scream coming from the kitchen. She considered ignoring the cry for help, and continuing on to the room to meet with the boss, but guilt wouldn’t let her. With a sigh, she turned around and headed to the kitchen to investigate. She covered a few metres when Mars came sprinting down the hallway, looking as pale as a ghost.

“You have to help me, Jupiter!” Mars screamed, grabbing both her wrists, fingernails digging deep into the flesh. “Cyrus wants me to make him a coffee, but there’s something scary inside the kitchen, and I don’t wanna go in there again!” she blurted.

Jupiter freed her arms. “It’s not Charon, is it?” Sometimes, Charon forgot to put on pants in the morning.

Mars shook her head. “It’s so much worse.” Her bottom lip trembled, tears beginning to form in her eyes. Whatever had spooked her must’ve been pretty bad if it was scarier than Charon without pants. “You have to help me, Jupiter. If you don’t, we’ll all suffer. You know how the boss gets when he misses out on his morning coffee.”

Really mad, Jupiter thought. She remembered that one time Cyrus had thrown a tantrum because the coffee machine had broken down. Papers and books had gone flying in all directions while the boss ranted on and on about the incompetent fools he was surrounded by before he eventually calmed down and acted like nothing had happened.

“All right. Take me to the kitchen.” Mars led the way down the halls. An uneasiness feeling gripped her stomach as she drew closer to his destination. What could possibly be so terrible? They walked a couple of more metres until they reached the archway leading into the kitchen. At first, Jupiter wasn’t sure what she was supposed to be looking at when Mars thrust a finger forward, drawing her eyes to the creature sitting on the ground.

Jupiter’s eyes widened. It was a spinarak, and the spider pokémon was nibbling on something she couldn’t quite make out. She dropped a hand down to her pokébelt then remembered her pokémon were in the boss’ office for evaluation. They weren’t due to be returned until later in the week. She started to sweat.

“What do we do, Jupiter?” Mars pleaded.

Jupiter was too scared to be speak. The spinarak dropped its meal, and climbed up the cabinet walls, then made itself comfortable on the boss’s favourite mug. It waved its mandibles in the air, as if taunting the two commanders. Jupiter would’ve been annoyed if she hadn’t been so scared. “I-I’m afraid you are on your own, Mars. I-uh-have an appointment to have my nose hairs removed. Yes, that’s right. I have an appointment!” she blabbered.

The spinarak raised its abdomen in the air and squirted out some web much to Jupiter’s horror. The boss was going to be pissed when he discovered his favourite mug was covered in silky web from a spider’s behind. Jupiter didn’t want to be around when that happened, and tried to make a break for the exit, but her legs were frozen in place from fear.

“What in the name of Arceus is going on in here?” Saturn demanded, storming into the kitchen, looking like he had just been hit in the face by a powerful gust of wind. His hair stuck out in all directions, his face was a deep shade of red, and he was lacking a shirt. These were the usual signs that Saturn had gotten into a fight with his bed sheets again. Mars pointed at the spider. Saturn looked. A high-pitched girly scream left his mouth. “Oh my Arceus, get that thing out of here!”

The two girls looked at him. “You get rid of it!” Mars said.

Saturn shook his head. “You discovered it first.”

“Well… you’re the man here.”

“And you’re the female. The kitchen is your responsibility,” Saturn argued back. “Besides, the boss asked you to make his coffee which means you have to remove the threat.”

Jupiter was going to call Saturn out for being a coward when Saturn stopped speaking. He started shuffling backwards, then bolted, saying he needed to answer a call to nature. The terror on his face could mean one of two things – either Charon was standing there without his small clothes on, or Cyrus was there. Slowly, she turned around.

“Uh, hi boss,” Mars squeaked.

Jupiter remained silent, too shocked to speak a single word. Their boss was currently wearing a towel around his waist, one hand holding it up. He must’ve come running when he heard Saturn’s girly scream. It wasn’t a kind gesture – she knew him better than that. He was probably worried the grunts were up to no good again.

“Mars, I have been waiting for ten minutes now. It doesn’t normally take you this long to prepare a mug of coffee… I am beginning to question your abilities,” Cyrus said, still blissfully unaware of the spider sitting on the kitchen bench. “What is the meaning of this delay?”

Mars seemed to shrink in size, and stepped in closer to Jupiter, tugging on her arm again. “There’s a spinarak on the bench,” she murmured, eyes staring down at the floor.

“A what?” Cyrus demanded.

“A spinarak,” Jupiter said, turning around to point to the creature only to find it was no longer there. Her heart skipped a beat – where the hell had that thing gone? Was it even there to begin with or had she been drinking too much of Charon’s special juice that she was beginning to see things? She hoped that wasn’t the case.

“It was there before, I swear it!” Mars blurted out, releasing her hold on Jupiter’s arm, and rushing over to join Cyrus to grab his right arm. “There’s a spinarak in the kitchen! I’m sure it’s hiding and watching us now, waiting to strike!”

He pushed her away. “Do not be so foolish, Mars. There are no spiders in this building. We have pest control. Now, you and Jupiter will return to your chambers – I will make the coffee myself seeing as you are both delusional and cannot be trusted to carry out simple tasks,” he concluded, sauntering over towards the bench.

“But boss…” Mars whined.

That was when Jupiter noticed it. During the argument with Saturn, the spinarak had snuck away to lay an ambush for the next poor soul. Cyrus was the spider’s next victim. It clung to his backside. Jupiter nudged Mars in the ribs and drew her attention towards the spider. “There it is…” she whispered. “What do you think we should do?”

Mars was too busy staring at the boss’ backside, a deep shade of red forming on her cheeks. The poor girl look flustered. It was a well-known fact that Mars had a crush on Cyrus. She wrote stories about him, she drew pictures of him, and she even followed him around all the time… Silly girl. “We have to be brave and remove it,” she replied a few moments afterwards, hesitant. “If it was anyone else, I’d leave it there, but it’s the boss. We have to save him, Jupiter.” Reaching down, she removed her right shoe, then straightened, wielding the item as a weapon.

Jupiter hung back, fingernails resting on her lower lip. Could Mars do it? Could Mars remove the spinarak off the boss’ without smearing guts all over the place? A naughty part of Jupiter wanted Mars to do more than smear spinarak guts all over the boss – wouldn’t it be amusing for that towel to drop? Just as Mars was about to swat the spider, Cyrus turned around, eyebrows raised. “What are you doing, commander? What has gotten into you today?”

“Boss, stay still, let me hit you.”

“What?”

“Turn around.”

“Are you giving me orders, commander?” At that precise moment, the spinarak appeared on Cyrus’s head. “Now what is it?”

Mars pointed a hand up, and Jupiter did the same, eyes locked on the arachnid. “Boss, don’t move,” Jupiter said.

“If this is some game, commanders…” he threatened.

The spinarak jumped and landed on Mars’ face. Mars screamed, released her shoe, and flailed her arms around, desperately trying to fling the creature off her face. Rushing forwards, Jupiter picked up Mars’ shoe and tried to whack it off, successfully striking the younger commander in the nose, missing the spinarak by a couple of inches.

“What in the name of Arceus…” Cyrus muttered.

“Don’t just stand there, do something!” Mars shrieked.

The spinarak had other plans – it had no intentions of giving up just yet. It crawled to the top of her head, raised its abdomen, wriggled it and sent forth a stream of silky web at Cyrus’s face. He cursed, he raged, and swore some more, then brought his hands to his face to remove the stuff off. In doing so, he released his grip on his towel, baring his man-parts to the world.

“Hey, that isn’t fair!” Charon said, storming into the kitchen, while Cyrus fought with himself. “How come when I wear no pants, everyone complains, but when the boss decides to bare all, no one says a thing?” Thankfully, Charon was wearing pants. “And why is Cyrus covered in white stuff? Do I even want to know?”

“There’s a spinarak in here,” Jupiter said, averting her gaze from the poor boss. He had frozen, mortified. She had never seen him look so embarrassed before. If she had a working camera, she would’ve used it then to take a quick photo to send to the other team bosses for blackmail purposes. Cyrus snapped himself out of his trance, pulled up his towel, and tried to restore order (and dignity).

“Charon! Get rid of the spinarak now! Jupiter, Mars… Don’t you dare say a word or I will have you forced to sleep in the Nap Room with the other idiots,” he threatened.

“Awww look, he’s blushing,” Jupiter said, unable to help herself. “Relax boss, it’s nothing we haven’t seen before.”

“We will not speak of this incident further. Now, help Charon find the spinarak and have it destroyed. You can have the rest of the afternoon off,” he said, then turned around, and stormed back to his office to sulk…. Or do whatever it was that he did when he was trying to restore dignity. Once he was gone, Mars and Jupiter giggled, temporarily forgetting about the rogue spider in light of the boss’ misery.

“Gosh, he could make quite a number of people happy with that thing,” Mars said almost dreamily. “We have the best boss.”

“It’s a darn shame I didn’t have my camera on me,” Jupiter replied.

“You know what, Jupiter? I don’t find that spinarak so scary anymore,” Mars mused.

“Yeah, neither. I’ll just think of the boss when I see one.”

“Doesn’t anyone care what I think?” Charon said.

“No.”

Jupiter dropped her gaze down to the floor at the silky white stuff. “We should probably clean this up – someone else might get the wrong idea otherwise.” She grabbed a cloth, dropped to her knees, and proceeded to scrub.

“I can’t believe he gave us the rest of the afternoon off.”

“May as well enjoy it then. I hear Lysandre and his commanders are in town. We should drop by the casino tonight and watch them perform. I hear they put on quite… an entertaining act.”

“Can I come?” said Charon.

“Arceus, no.”

“Just go away, Charon,” Mars added.

Charon hung his head and grumbled then walked away. Once he was gone, Mars turned to Jupiter and smiled. “Everything turned out all right, after all.”


End file.
